I did this on the bus. Amidst distracting texts and Google Docs lying to me that I can do this offline. It’s been a week and a half, that last week of June. You know something is up when I don’t blog. All the same, such times are enough to come up with a million posts.

Anyway, one lesson from last week. Fast Fade. You know Slow Fade, right? Casting Crowns nini nini. Ever listened to the actual words to the song? I have. I did again this morning in a matatu, as I wondered what I’d write about this week.

It’s a slow fade, when you give yourself away.
It’s a slow fade, when black and white have turned to gray.
And thoughts invade, choices are made,
a price will be paid, when you give yourself away.
People never crumble in a day.
It’s a slow fade, it’s a slow fade.

It becomes a really fast fade when you convince yourself that things just happen. Things don’t just happen, you make them happen. One minute you’re flirting, the next you’re telling him to stop. When flattery leads to compromise, the end is always near, the song goes. It becomes as fast as you want it to be. One minute you’re saying no, the next you’re saying yes even when nothing has changed. Everything that made you say no in the first place is still in place.

But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one. Matthew 5:37

When your conscience says no, stick with it. There’s a reason it’s your conscience. Don’t be desperate to settle for anything because you saw wedding photos on Facebook which made you think that you are growing old. On Monday morning I woke up to this comment on this blog by a Mr Kevin. “Its a good read. Nevertheless It can be prudent to start taking one day a week committed to praying for a life partner. It would do you good. God created marriage, and only He can guide one to their life partner.”

I breathed a sigh of acknowledgement. I know I should pray. I know I should take it easy. I know I should wait. But somehow I find myself going back on waiting for real after writing about it last year. It worked for a while, until I began to rethink the concept. It’s called conforming. Do not conform to the standards of this world. Don’t do things you shouldn’t do because you’re being nice to someone. It will no longer be nice when you hurt each other after dragging each other down a loveless relationship just because you felt you needed to be nice.

When your close family and friends advise you against something, follow their advice. They love you. A lecturer once told us that nobody wishes you the best. That it’s all a lie. Frankly though, there are people who truly wish you the best. Consult them.

Take a breath. Think before you hit send. Pause before you lead each other on. Use your head. Reason. It’s never too late to stop something you know you should not pursue. The solution is not deleting WhatsApp (which I did). The solution is all about your resolve and your no being no. Do not be desperate or look desperate.

I have tried my best not to blog about anybody and keep it short for once. And all the ‘you’s I have filled the post with are really to myself. It is beginning to get real serious. So expect more fictional accounts from now on. And it turns out Google Docs was not lying. I can edit offline. Bundles have got to be conserved. Happy July! Take it slow. Bless! 😉

Written by Shiku Ngigi
Mum and dad's daughter. Shouting big sister. More than a Facebook friend. Jesus Freak. Wannabe Tomboy. Mouse Potato. Earphone Junkie. Texts over calls. Writes the way she talks.

    2 Comments

  1. Kizzy B July 2, 2014 at 9:23 am Reply

    beautiful piece my dear 🙂

    • Shiku Ngigi July 3, 2014 at 10:06 am Reply

      We all need some reality checks. Thanks girlfriend. 🙂

Leave a Comment

Your thoughts go here ↓