You were going to procrastinate again. You were going to write this post some other day. But then someone somewhere insisted that you had to do it today, not tomorrow. So you gave in. He has a point. A few days more and it will be September! Sigh. Where to start?

You have so many things running in your mind on any given day or time that they all seem to evaporate and override each other by the time you want to sit and think of one of them. Days are a blur most times. You get up, snooze a million times, take your sugarless tea (oh yes, you can finally take sugarless tea without blinking) and get to work. Speaking of sugarless tea. It’s been a journey of many turns. You have thought about some of the ladies you know with flat tummies and they have one thing in common – no sugar. Why not you? People insist that you don’t have a tummy but you know you do. These are the kind of friends you don’t need in your life. Friends that tell you lies to make you feel better. Lol. We see you.

So we got a new reverend in our church quite a while back. I only saw and listened to him for the first time yesterday. Every time I am on duty in Sunday school, he is preaching. Let’s just say I have missed a lot. The very tall minister of the word is one of those for whom people actually walk into the building to listen to instead of walking out. Best believe. I saw that for the first time yesterday, where the opposite happens. His sense humour is something else too.

We’ve been having sermons about the fruit of the Holy Spirit. It so happened that yesterday’s was Self-control. Na by the way you guys should stop saying the fruits of the Holy Spirit. It very clearly says the fruit. One fruit with many aspects. But anyway, that’s just politics. Fruit can very well mean fruits. Depends on where you went to school and with whom.

[su_quote cite=”Galatians 5: 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.”][/su_quote]

Olympics mode.

[su_quote cite=”1 Corinthians 9: 24 Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. 25 Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. 26 Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. 27 No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.”][/su_quote]

Back by public demand. Or rather, because Dickson insisted. So, guys, I mentioned that I ditched Samsung phones. For good. Okay, maybe never say never. Maybe they will change. I went into the bowels of Luthuli Avenue and got my awesome Sony Xperia Z5. Oh yes I did, a while back. I am a hustler, people. Get this, the authorized Sony dealer that was based next to Uchumi Sarit Centre (until recently, not sure where it was moved to) was selling it for almost 80,000 KES. 80,000 people! Who does that? Like why, then, don’t I just get the S7 that everyone was head over heels and that very much tempted me? That camera, eish!

Anyway, I was not going to change my mind because of a camera and good customer service at their service centres. No way. Background, Shindroid 2.1 went kaput for a while. I think I jinxed after I wrote about it. I had to go back to Samsung folks to fix it at an outrageous price. But a Kikuyu had mercy on me and did the same thing for almost half the price. So it’s a brand new phone again and belongs to my mother. Two birds, one stone.

So how much, did I buy my Sony Z5? Take a wild guess.

Can you believe it? It’s already second half! Let’s not start with a cliché about time though. You know how it is nowadays. Let’s start with the cold cliché. July. *shivers* You sit by the jiko nowadays, even as you browse the Internet. Your cat too. But she prefers the hot water bucket next to you. You wear twenty pieces of cloth during the day. You even campaigned for a heater in the office. No one wants to walk to lunch in the fog. You all wait for someone to volunteer to bring it. You don’t complain about the car A/C being on. Heck, you turn it on yourself to rise above the 12 degrees outside. This year is different though. No cheesy texts from dudes asking what’s keeping you warm. Whether they can help. You pretty much closed that chapter officially. Only positive vibes, Positive energy. Constructive discussions. Anyone who dares brings trash to your space gets shut out.

Cat bucket

You finally (FINALLY!!!!!) get that new mattress. Of course not without some drama. You and your all-knowing dad drive to the supermarket, confident you have the right measurement for your beds. (Side note: he used a string.) You shop around every supermarket in the vicinity and finally the cheapest. You make the purchase, haggle over transportation cost and hit the road. Your days of sleeping on a boat of a mattress are gone. Then you place it on the bed and it does not fit. Anti-climax. Lesson learnt. Soma lebo next time. Eventually the supermarket orders the right size and you get your mattress. Sema struggle ya kuamka! Not like you are not known for snoozing your alarm from 6:30 all the way to 7:00. Even your sister has mastered your alarm tone. But this makes it even worse. It’s good for your back though, and it’s not like you’re getting to work late. Far from it.

The not writing was getting toxic, so I am back to writing as often as I possibly can. Last July, I wrote a similar post. Can you believe it? It’s been a year! Then I just read it and realized, boy do we change! Just wait and see. Also, this is now, officially a yearly post.

1. Quarter-full bottle of Stoney Tangawizi

Depending on how you look at is, that is. It is three-quarter full if you subscribe to that school of thought. I am not a fan of soda, but sometimes, I insist. This is from Friday. Imagine. And it’s still fizzy.

Takeaway: Plastic bottles are not that bad, they keep stuff fresh. Just dispose them of correctly.

2. Notebook

This is still here, as was last year. Only a different notebook. Kartasi. More or less still new. My other bag has one that I used for sermon notes yesterday. Paper Factory brand. Those are the cutest notebooks!

Takeaway: Oh, Shiku has another bag! What?!

That reminded me of that Love is… comic strip from back in the 90s Daily Nation leisure page. Actually, if you Google it, that’s the first result. Anyway, that’s not the point.

Sometimes I struggle. I struggle with a lot of things. Feelings of uncertainty. Feelings of hurt. Holding on to hurt. Holding on to the wrong things people do to me. Feelings of fear. Then right after that comes the guilt. The defence. The rationalization. The waste of time taking things personally (although I will admit I don’t know how else I can take things other than personally). I also struggle with love. With the concept of it. What it is. What it should be. Whether I should even be thinking the stuff I think if I claim to love those around me. Today’s sermon made me think about this. It’s been a while since I listened to a great sermon. You know those guys who preach without shouting? Those guys who are straight to the point and show you things clearly and in all practicability? That was our preacher today.

The word was about love. Passages we know by heart. Galatians 5:22-23. Fruit of the spirit. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. Oh, it’s the second result on Google when you search for “Love is”.

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

It’s been a minute since you thought about this topic.

Lie.

Everywhere you turn, that topic is bound to crop up. Think back to this Sunday. The first thing that happens when you walk into the church compound is a friend telling you that he dreamt of attending your wedding. Somebody say amen? He insisted on it, even after bumping into him again after the service, even though the last time you talked was ages ago. This is not the only dream that someone has told you about btw.

How are you guys? So today, we’re all about conquering. When I was young, like primary school young, my dad took out a foolscap and wrote down something for me with a felt pen and made me stick on my bedroom wall. It was about Julius Caesar and what he said after a certain victory. What I remember most about that passage is the last phrase, “We came, we saw, we conquered.” When you Google that, you find the actual phrase was in Latin, “Veni, vidi, vici”.

By now you might have guessed why dad wrote that for me. Every day, I saw that writing on the wall. Literally. And every day I strived to conquer in class. I also had a newspaper clipping next to that foolscap, I remember. Betty Gikonyo was on it. I don’t know why I don’t remember the other lady on that paper. Actually I do know. I remember Betty because for half the years I have existed, I wanted to grow up to be a doctor. Yes. Didn’t we all? I’d like to say that I changed my mind easily. I didn’t. It was a combination of teenage indecisiveness and JAB’s decisiveness. But I still went ahead and conquered whatever came through. My dad says “conger” btw, like every other person of his generation. So for the longest time I was confused on the pronunciation. It made no sense to me. Like why do old guys decide a q should be pronounced as g? Anyway, that’s beside the point.

Good? You know how it is. The cold. The Twitter dramas. The quest for truth.

Sometimes you wonder why you are doing what you’re doing. You wear very many hats at work. Very many. Too many.Sometimes you almost fall into the trap of comparison. You want to compare yourself with others who look like they do nothing all day. But then you look back a year and realize you have grown immensely. You can look people in the eye when you talk. People think you know a lot about certain things and look to you for help. Even when you think you don’t really know anything. Then when you sit with them and talk about something you thought everyone knew, you realise you’ve been sitting on a mine! Not a land mine of course, but the Turkana kinda thing. A gold mine.

This is a reblog (if that’s a word) from a blog I follow. The first time I am doing this, even though the blog is on holiday. Worthy cause. Click below and read on.

So this is happening. 1. I have good friends. I have not lifted and will likely not lift a finger towards organising this. These days I get tired from just waking up so this is good. I’ve been out of commission for about 8 months now. This time it was really out of commission. […]

via When #Sheblossoms is not just about me – Lupus Diaries — She Blossoms…

shikungigi

Long weekend. Yayyy! Right? You had it all drawn up, how you’d spend it. First, there was that cousins’ meetup. You are all grown-up and so are most of your cousins. You have finally decided to form a group that meets up and helps each other out, like your parents have done for years before you. That is a good distraction, a really good one before other issues crop up in the remaining three days. You sit in the dark, smoky but yet cosy kitchen with your closest cousin and talk men while cutting up veggies to go with the meat. You nod at her story. She has a story. You don’t. He lied. The end. Men. Cucu asks your brother whether he has found “a person”, directly translated. You all laugh, you, bro, cuz and cucu together. He says the “person” is coming. You wonder why cucu didn’t ask you. Why she never asks you. How young does cucu think I am? You ask yourself. She definitely knows exactly how old I am. Should I be worried that she is not asking me? You don’t find an answer and move on real fast.

So this story has to be told. How I found myself dripping with tears at a modest corner office at Kikuyu. How I learnt so much about my church just sitting at its office. I had planned to take my passport for months. I even filled in the application on ecitizen and paid but just left it until the day I’d take leave from work just for it. That day finally came last week. And because I had a feeling something would go wrong somewhere, I took two days off. Let me tell you feelings are solid things.

You might be aware that I wanted to be a web designer after uni. You also know that’s not what I ended up doing. I still harbour those dreams sometimes. Plus playing around with the way this blog looks always energises me. Anyway, yesterday I got a call from a friend. I was getting my hands looking for dusty books at a supermarket in Westlands.