By Mwangi wa Njihia
In the beginning was man. Not the plurality of humankind but the biological man. And the man was an undisputed social head. And the society became patriarchal. And men have dominated the women ever since. That was until some few years ago when women subtly cracked male domination. The women then delivered a full punch through an effort called female emancipation. And with that, women demanded equal status to men. And the ‘masculine’ woman was given life. But the man started losing ‘form’. Things have never been the same since.
When change comes and an establishment dissipates, there are always orphans of the old order. And the orphans become lost in the new order. Female emancipation orphaned the males. Men lost grip of what they are. What is being a man? With the emergence of the gay man, metrosexual men, homosocial man and many other types of ‘men’, being a man has become even more difficult. It is easier for one to say what he is not rather than what he is. For instance, rather than saying, “I am a man”, it is easier for the modern male to say “I am not a gay man.”
The absurdity of this is that, traditionally, the role of man was tied more to his physical body for him to be considered masculine. But today, we have the feminine masculine i.e. men who are feminine and the masculine feminities i.e. women who are masculine and of course the transvestites.
The traditional masculinities were strong on the basis of the fact that they were not questioned. Additionally, man was not supposed to be emotional. Women on the other hand were mainly conditioned to be damsels in distress and helpers of men. They had the express ‘right’ to get emotional and did not have permission to question the man. The man needed not say a thing as it was assumed that whatever he had to say was known. The woman on the other hand fought to tell her story.
Times are changed now. We now have a man struggling to cope with the enlightened and bold woman. This woman is loudly proclaiming that she can do what a man can do. This woman can also provide everything for herself including sex. She wants lots of freedom and she stops at nothing to have it. She does not give a hoot about the male ego. Yet, it is this ego that makes the man a unique creature (at least to a big extent). But a man is still a man; he will try his best to repress his frustration. But the psychologist will tell you that repression leads to implosion or explosion.
Statistics reveal that more men than women commit suicide. Fatal alcohol use is more prevalent among the males. Sex offences against females by the males get uglier by day. More men are opening up about being gay. Bitter hit-and-run sex is almost the order of the day. Cases of domestic violence committed by men are increasing. Why? Frustration. Frustrated that we, the men, want to be men but women are busy erasing the first two letters from the term ‘woman’. And the men are busy punishing themselves for not being ‘men’. As for what can be done, watch this space.
Mwangi is that guy who delights in arguments; constructive debates on current issues and I have to admit he has a point here. He has also been the inspiration behind a bunch of posts in here. The end. 😀